Just one more hour until doomsday!  And if I hear that kid say just one more time, “Dibs on the drumstick”, I’ll just scream!  I wish that I was a turnkey instead of a turkey cause then I’d escape my fate and get back to that animal farm I came from.  I don’t care if those other critters say that I’m ducking my responsibility or not!  If I wait just one more month then someone else’s goose will be cooked!

You know, human logic escapes me.  That hunter that bagged me literally beat the stuffings out of me when he caught me.  Then I heard his wife say that she was planning on putting that stuffing back inside me?  Huh! 

Say, maybe I can paint my back feathers so that I look like the old NBC Peacock.  They’d never put my neck on the block if they thought I was famous?  Or maybe I can talk talk that mutton head dumb sheep into this-

I

I mean, if I escape I’d be on the lamb anyone! Maybe even ride him piggyback so that those humans’ don’t get the chance to pig out on me!  Okay you can call me a chicken turkey if you want to but I’d just like to see anyone of you stick their neck out for me in less than an hour now! 

You know, in that first Thanksgiving they had fish instead of turkey.  Perhaps I could interest them in some creamed herring?  Hmmm?

HAPPY THANKSGIVING FROM BIG BASS LAKE AND BEYOND TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY!